Because doing link ups is easier than writing my own post, and I'm home sick today with a sinus infection. fun stuff!
Here we go:
Remember that one time, my brother lent me his plasma screen TV. I was watching my nephew and my two boys and they came to me and said that the TV wasn't working, that someone had thrown something at it. (Plasma TV's are very delicate and cannot be hit with anything otherwise the plasma leaks out and the TV is broke). I didn't know who did it. My dad then went out and bought us a beautiful 3D plasma TV, 55'', all the bells and whistles, the $100 HD cord, the 3D DVD player, the $100 glasses x4, you name it. Plus a 5yr warranty. No less than 5 months later, Austin comes to me and says Abram threw a battery at the TV
(in his defense, he said he was throwing it at a bad guy on the TV). Mother Fucker. So we replaced it with the same one. And guess what? That was in January and the TV is still sitting in its box in the corner of the living room until someone matures a bit more and learns not to throw things at TVs.
|Yes, he is adorable. But don't turn your back on him... he kills. Mostly TVs though. Your children are still safe.|
|And guess what?? He's not even a fucking lab! HA|
Remember the time, I was busy in the backyard and Adam answered the front door to someone selling Home Security Systems. He brought him to me and told me to tell the guy about the system we already have, while he was nonchalantly winking at me because we didn't have a damn system my neighbor just gave me a sign to put in my yard. So here I look like an idiot "no I don't know where the current panel is" "no I don't know how much i pay" "No I haven't seen any cameras or door sensors" "Oh we don't currently have a system? Okay then" I could of fucking told you that had my husband not lied to you then brought you inside anyways. So we signed up for the fricken system. It's not the worst $54 I spend a month.
Remember the few times, I was trying to get used to this alarm system and would forget to set the motion sensor AND forget to put the dog in his kennel on the same fucking day? Yeah I wish I could forget too. I remember how the damn dog scratched the shit out of my brand new wooden table and clawed the crap out of my $1,000 leather couch, and chewed up a brand new Thirty One bag my mom had just bought Austin, and chewed holes in the pillows of the other couch, and chewed the edges of my wooden stairs. I also remember setting the motion alarm but FORGETTING to put the dog away so that when he sets the motion alarm off, the police come. Do that 3 times and watch your ass get fined $50. no joke.
Remember that one time, my husband said "Let's get a tortoise" and I said "Shit, why not get two?" Why Karyn, Why?? Who takes care of these bastards? That's right. I do. But I DON'T change their bedding. No sirree. Adam does that :)
|Oogway (from some Disney movie, Kung Fu Panda maybe?) and Sasha (a Russian whore, these tortoises are Russian)|
Remember that one time, my kids found a dead squirrel and I let them play with it?
|I kid.I kid.|